Monday, February 07, 2005

Musings

If you are an artist,writer, composer, or creative thinker, what inspires you? Do you have a Muse? My 'muse' if you will, is a place. The island I grew up on - Kodiak. My island lies in the Pacific Gulf of Alaska. She is huge, and I could never encompass her entirety in my gaze, even from a plane. Her beaches, forests, ponds, streams, bays, and flowers, plants, fish, birds, and her seasons and weather- from winter winds and rain to soft summer nights - have been the source of my creativity since I was a young girl. She was my playmate, my mother, my solace and love ever since I can remember. I wrote a daily journal, scores of poems, drew pictures, made carvings and masks while I lived on my island, inspired by the fierce breakers, gentle waves, warm winds, soft birdsong, and the spirits of my ancestors who roam the coasts and forest paths.

But I moved away from Alaska 7 years ago, and have since found my creative drive dwindling. There have been other reasons why my creativity has waned, to be sure. But now, even when my energy has returned, along with my health, I still cannot return to my former level of creativity. There are little spurts here and there, but nothing compares to what it was before.

Perhaps its the hustle and bustle of life here - Kodiak is such a sleepy place, where the pace of life speeds up only for the hectic fishing seasons, but most of her inhabitants still shuffle along. There is little traffic to speak of - there being such a little road system. You can drive about 60 miles south of Town, and about 10 miles north. Maybe another 20 to the west. Most of the island is rugged mountainous terrain, home to the giant Kodiak Grizzlies, or rough rocky coast.

Or maybe I'm just a Wild Child - who will never be happy anywhere else - destined to be unhappy, because if I go back, I face my partner cleaving from me, refusing to live on the wild outpost of the Last Frontier, inundated by rain and fog and fog and rain, and wind.

Have you experienced a similar dry spell - especially one you attribute to leaving a place?

Go see some pictures of my former world here:
http://www.geocities.com/elderberrystudio2000/index.html
and here:
http://www.kodiak.org/geography.html

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